Full disclosure, I stole this title. I stole it from a presentation made by the undersheriff of Wabaunsee county at a county conference I just attended. The presentation was about using social media in county government and all that, but I just saw Memes. I love memes. I make memes and quite frankly I’m hilarious. And as it turns out, this guy was too but that’s not all we had in common. More on that later though.

I also know that my sense of humor isn’t for everyone. In fact my friendly neighborhood eye doctor pointed out recently that my humor isn’t everyone’s “cup of tea.” You know what else isn’t everyone’s cup of tea? Running a marathon. You don’t have to be crazy to run 26 miles but I’m pretty sure it helps. Just saying .

So call this is a test to see if getting a laugh or the end justifies my memes.

Now I found this one pretty funny, but Mean Eye Brenna the fun hater didn’t agree on this one.

This one flopped as well. I should have “muled it”over more.

But it’s not just Brenna who I pick on. the Covid Thanksgiving provided a few opportunities as well.

But I swear that I’m not always teasing at the expense of others. Sometimes I’m being helpful

And sometimes I can be nice and caring.

Then there are some that must have been funny at the time but now are just eh.

Now there are others that I won’t show. Maybe they aren’t funny or mean spirited. Maybe they are just personal. Which brings me back to the conference. And the presentation. This guy was hilarious and also like me, probably not everyone’s “cup of tea.” A Marine, law enforcement and very driven. More things in common as I was Navy, I am an elected official and also very driven. So I was taken aback a little when he stated during this presentation that he used to have a major drinking problem but has been sober several years. Now I wasn’t taken aback because he had an issue with booze. Just because he was so open and at ease about it. This is another thing that I have in common with this man. I had a pretty serious drinking problem. I had support. I got some help and I got better. I haven’t touched a drop in years. The details of the when and why and how aren’t what’s important now. Being open and at ease about it, is important. While I have never tried to hide this part of me, I haven’t advertised it either. Those closest to me know about it and if asked by someone, I will talk about. But open is hard.

So why not be more open? Guilt, shame and some embarrassment. I might say I don’t want to embaress my family, but I didn’t seem to mind causing issues back years ago for them. Fear? Being judged? Not fitting in? Yes to all three. Having people think less of me? Absolutely. Having it brought up professionally or politically was always been something I dreaded. But that has already happened. I was made into a meme and a video. But you know what, I survived. But it’s a clear reminder that the stigma of mental health or addiction is alive and well. Dont think so? If I would have been a cancer survivor instead of a survivor of alcoholism, would it have still been okay to make me into a meme? Would the ends still justify the memes?

When Mathew Perry passed away recently it was all love and respect for him, and rightfully so. But what if he had just relapsed and made a public scene? All love and respect or would it be ridicule and memes?

While I still love memes, anything that is done that tears someone down, no matter the reason, doesn’t have a place in my life. No matter how great the result, it is impossible to justify cruelty. Why do we root for others to fail?

Will people judge me for this post? Maybe some will but that’s okay. That’s on them not me. So last night I was in the Parsons Christmas Parade. And I only got heckled one time! By who? My same friendly neighborhood eye doctor. And it should be known it wasn’t really a heckle. First he waved, then clapped for us. Then shouted that I should have driven my old work truck instead of the nice one. I would also count him as a good friend. One that I can disagree with on issues. A friend that expects me to conduct myself with integrity, honesty and quite frankly sobriety too. Not to tear down though. Someone that knows your faults and believes in you anyway. I don’t have the words to thank him for that. That’s the kind of people that we need in our life.

We need people like Wabaunsee county Undersherrif Eric Kirsch. Who said he was nervous giving this presentation but gave me a boost to get to a place I have wanted to be for some time. I don’t have the words to thank him for that either.

We need people who hold us to a high standard. We need to be a community instead of a competition. Because the ends don’t justify the means as eventually we are left only with the means.

Finally we need people like my wife. Someone that refuses to let me take the easy route. Someone that sees helping others as a privilege and a gift. And she refuses to let me waste that gift. Even when she is gets tired of my shenanigans.